Hurt people, hurt people. Do you agree with this?
As I often do, I research my topics.
Here is a quote I found:
“Hurt people hurt people. We are not being judgmental by separating ourselves from such people. But we should do so with compassion. Compassion is defined as a ‘keen awareness of the suffering of another coupled with a desire to see it relieved.’ People hurt others as a result of their own inner strife and pain.”
-Will Bowen
As a result of hearing about bullying going on as young as age 9 in a Catholic school, I was guided to write about this.
How in the world do children do hurtful things to their classmates? One answer. They have been hurt by another or others.
Hurt people, hurt people.
Furthermore, when a child or a person is taught and treated with love, kindness, patience and respect by their parents and close people in their lives, that is what they will impart to others.
However, when a child is treated with disrespect, anger, irritability, impatience, unkindness and abused, they will in turn treat others this same way. This is how pain patterns get passed on, generation after generation.
As stated above, it’s important to find compassion for these hurt people.
How do you do that?
When you understand where their hurt and pain is coming from or even knowing that they could not treat you in a hurtful way, unless they themselves have been hurt, helps.
It’s then you can begin to find compassion for this hurt person.
“They aren’t bad; they are damaged and they deserve compassion. Note that compassion is an internal process, an understanding of the painful and troubled road trod by another. It is not trying to change or fix that person.”
-Will Bowen
Since we do not know everyone’s full story, we can’t see what goes on behind closed doors. We see people we know at school, events, work, church, and the gym, but we don’t always know the whole person. We don’t know what their life has brought them and what struggles they have been through.
Because life is not about avoiding pain or stopping others from hurting you, it’s about living life as it comes. This is where a good parent, friend or family member can help, if you have been hurt by a hurt person.
For instance, the young girl being bullied, has not only parents, but grandparents, who love, support and guide her.
Her chances for getting through this current pain a stronger person, are pretty high.
Also, its a chance to find ways to feel compassion and give forgiveness to the people who cause them pain.
Lastly, I know as my self-love grew over the years, I saw very clearly, the people who tried to hurt me, were hurt people.
You must grow your love, respect and compassion for yourself.
Learn to be kind and show kindness to yourself and others.
Then when a hurt person shows up in your life, you will be equipped with some understanding and compassion.
For that is really what a hurt person needs.
With love and compassion,
Connie
PS. Here is a YouTube video and song I found about hurt people:
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